


Love Will Tear Us Apart

by Cerfblanc



Series: Teen Sam & Nathan [5]
Category: Uncharted (Video Games)
Genre: 80s references, Cassandra Morgan - Freeform, Implied/Referenced Incest, Joy Division - Freeform, M/M, Musical References, Nathan thinks he’s straight, Sam is an idiot, Sibling Bonding, Sibling Love, Swimming Pools, swimming lessons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-18
Updated: 2017-12-18
Packaged: 2019-02-16 16:10:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13057482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cerfblanc/pseuds/Cerfblanc
Summary: Swimming lessons. Inappropriate thoughts. Bathroom-intimacy. Drive-thru argumentations. The usual. Eighties aesthetic is mixed in there too somewhere, all of it originating from Sam. Nathan can’t get his head round it.





	Love Will Tear Us Apart

 

 _I feel stoned_ , Nathan thought.

Maybe it was the medical-like smell of the chlorine that constantly hung in the air of the building. Or maybe it was the stifling warmth that filled the large room. Nathan wasn't sure, but he knew that both the air and the smell were making him feel a little unwell. He blinked tiredly, and checked the time on his phone.

3:52pm.

His big brother should be getting out of the pool soon.

After swimming two-hundred lengths, and an hour's session of free-diving in the plunge pool, he was probably going to want and get something to eat on the way home.

Nathan knew the cycle like the back of his hand. Sam borrowed their mother's car and did his swimming class in the afternoon every Saturday, and the end of the episode would usually result up at a fast-food drive-thru.

Since their mother worked at the local museum from morning until evening, she always made sure Nathan was never left alone, thus, he was practically glued to his older brother every second of the day.

Wherever Sam went—Nathan went.  
  
The coach blew his whistle; a signal that the class was over.

Nathan didn't waste time on packing up his books into his rucksack, along with a packet of half-eaten Doritos and a bottle of cola. He was finally free. Now he just had to wait for Sam to get showered and changed, and they could finally leave this place.

He got up from the back bench that was overlooking the pool, and pondered down the steps whilst pulling on his rucksack; as he did, he caught sight of Sam pulling himself up onto the pool's ledge—running his hands through his wet hair, slicking it back.

Nathan stopped in his tracks as he saw his brother.

He felt the slightest sweat break at the nape of his neck, and he felt his cheeks burn a little at the sight. Maybe the chlorine really _was_ getting to him. Or maybe it was seeing his lean, overly attractive eighteen year old brother who had _no idea_ how tantalising and down-right divine he looked just by sitting at the edge of a pool—

No. No.

_No way._

Nathan could have considered Sam to be almost sacramental he looked that beautiful, or perhaps that was just…borderline weird. It probably was. A thirteen year old boy should be after girls—not contemplating about how attractive his sibling was. And anyway, the majority of people his age he knew found their siblings apparently _unattractive_. Hell, that alone called Nathan out. He was gay. Or possibly bi.

Nathan furrowed his brows at the thought, puzzled in the moment, _yeah I'm probably bi._

"God, no." Nathan uttered back at his thoughts as he ripped away his gaze from his brother, and headed out the exit and into the reception. He had to clear his head.

He pondered on the thought of going to the bathroom the moment he set his rucksack down beside one of the waiting chairs in the room. The drive home was at least half an hour or so, and the stop to get food would elongate that. Without another debate in his head, he left his bag and went to go locate the bathroom —even if it meant breathing in another dose of chlorine, either way he needed to relieve himself before Sam bounded round the corner and booted them both out the door to the car.

It took a good few solid minutes to try and figure out where the bathrooms were. There were no signs to say which way he was going, so he just had to hope any second now he would stumble past his goal.

And…he didn't.

"Fuck." He groaned in frustration and slumped against one of the tiled walls.

He could have just asked the clerk where they were, come to think of it. Then he currently wouldn't be cursing to himself.

Nathan flicked his eyes up to the door that was stood in front of him.

 _'Male changing rooms,_ ' It read.

He swallowed.

_Surely there must be a bathroom in there, right?_

Nathan sucked on his bottom lip in anticipation, and blinked. It wasn't like he was getting anxiety from thinking what could be behind that door.

He blinked again.

 _Okay maybe there was a_ little _bit of anxiety there._

 _And it's not like I'm a girl or anything_ , he thought, his mind indicating the 'male' part of the sign. He could feel his sub-conscience teasingly fight against him, and he swallowed back the slight fear of impending embarrassment.

_But you're gay._

"Bi." Nathan muttered. And with that he pushed open the door— _thank God_ —there was no one there.

Wait _what_?

Nathan blinked a couple of times as he poked his head round the door to find the changing room empty. Completely empty. When he glanced down at the floor the tiles were slightly wet, and in the light, the water seemed somewhat thin, meaning there were probably people in here earlier—before Sam's class. Maybe they were in a different changing room?

Nathan didn't latch onto the thought, and he shook it off as he wandered into the room of benches and hooks that were nailed to the walls. When he reached the far end, he found a bathroom.

"Finally," he uttered, and he opened the door, to find no one in there either. There were twelve closed stalls in a single row, and directly opposite them all was one long counter with a horizontal mirror above it, that stretched from one end to the other.

Nathan locked himself in one of the stalls, and the moment he was finished and was about to leave, to his absolute horror, he heard the door open. He didn't really understand why he felt so terrified about skulking around a swimming pool centre, but knowing the majority of people in the building were at least five to ten years older than him made him feel slightly awkward—and let's not skip the fact that at this time in particular, the majority of those people were super-fit guys—including Sam.

Nathan held his breath when he heard the stranger set something down on the counter, a heavy sigh, and the faint rustle of fabric.

 _Leave already_ , his mind screamed, even though it had only been ten seconds in to complete deadening silence.

One of the sink taps were turned on then, and he heard the smooth sound of hands running through liquid, and then being run through something that reminded him of… _foam_ …?

Nathan furrowed his brows at what he was trying to decipher behind an opaque door. Was he really going to wait for this stranger to leave? How long were they going to take? _Shit_ , Sam might be already be done showering—what if he's standing in reception waiting for him right now? He couldn’t call him, Nathan had left his phone in his bag.

_God. Dammit._

Nathan didn't even want to move from where he was stood. He felt as if the world would explode if he even breathed never mind taking one step. What the hell would this guy be doing in here if he isn't using the bathroom?

Nathan sucked on his bottom lip, hard.

 _I'll just…walk out_ , he thought. _Yeah. That's easy._

He had wished he stopped when he felt his body switch into what felt like automatic movement. His fingers pulled the lock on the stall door and he walked out to see the stranger completely naked, suds threaded through his hazel locks, and a face filled with complete shock.

The thing that topped everything off with the most extreme amount of awkwardness, was that the stranger was in fact, his brother.

"Holy shit," Those were the first words that fell from Nathan's mouth, and he felt his knees turn weak when his eyes so happened to drop down past his brother's hips. Sam burst out laughing.

"I _knew_ there was someone else in here!" he said with a grin. "Never thought it'd be you, though." He turned on the tap again, and leant his head down into the sink to wash out the suds in his hair. Nathan was overall confused with the situation.

One; why would Sam come to the bathroom to wash his hair (in a _sink_ ) when there's clearly showrooms for that? Two; why would he so calmly stand in the middle of the room stark naked when anyone could just walk in a see his… _everything_? And three; why the _fuck_ was he so chilled out about being naked in front of his little brother? Sure, in general Sam was a very relaxed person, but being so relaxed like this? Where was the dignity and privacy in _that_?

Nathan didn't even know where to start, and the only thing that left his mouth was the one word that questioned just about everything. "…Why?"

When Sam rinsed out the suds, he shook his head and dried his hair with the towel that was set beside him on the counter. "Well," he began as he patted his face dry. "the main changing rooms were packed and everyone was just mucking about as per usual in there, so I came here.”

Nathan couldn't help but steal glimpses of the other half of his brother whilst he explained his story. Everything about Sam was so damn perfect—every part of his body was made up of pure, fit muscle that wasn't overly strong and defined, yet it wasn't soft to the point where you couldn't tell that he had a six pack under his somewhat tanned skin. As well as that, there wasn't a single hair on his body. Not one. Which clearly indicated that he probably shaved often. _Everywhere_. Not just what was above.

_Or maybe he waxes himself._

Nathan swallowed.

"The shower rooms were pretty crowded as well, so that's another reason why I came here." Sam continued as he rummaged through his bag for what Nathan assumed was something to brush his hair with. He took out a comb, and began to swiftly pull it through his dark locks, the teeth raking against the strands so perfectly. His eyes were fixated on his reflection in the mirror as he spoke. "Plus it's nice and quiet here. I don't have to listen to guys discussing how they got laid at some party. It's so boring. Every conversation goes like, _oh, I came like four times_."

Nathan hummed in agreement, not really listening as he hoped his brother hadn't caught him peeking. Yet.

"Anyway, did you get bored too?" Sam added with a sigh as he put the comb away, done with his hair. He took out a canister of deodorant.

Nathan blinked twice. "Uh…I…needed the bathroom.”

"Y'know there's bathrooms beside the reception?"

"You're kidding."

Sam sprayed under his arms, and a translucent mist could be seen for a second or so before it dissolved in to the air. "Nope. They're just in the left, past the vending machines. Did you not see them?"

"No, I didn't." He answered back as he wandered past his brother for the door, the two making brief eye contact in the mirror. "I'm…gonna go wait for you in reception."

The statement jolted Sam in his place. "What? No, stay here, please." He whined. "I like talking to you."

Nathan stopped, his hand resting on the door handle. "But…you're naked."

That didn't seem to stop his brother. "So? You've seen me naked many times before. Besides, you already know what a dick looks like."

Sam was past the age of feeling self-conscious, that was for sure, but other than that every week of every month he would strip in a room full of other naked guys his age, so privacy wasn't exactly in his nature. Whereas Nathan was…more _aware_ of the whole thing. That was what made things awkward.

"You sound like Mom." Nathan said, and leant against the door.

"I don't care." Sam responded and stuck out his tongue at his little brother. "Stay here until I get changed. I don't like being lonely."

"Well…could you at least like…cover up?"

"We used to take baths together at one point, Nathan."

"That was way before you figured out how babies were made, you idiot."

"Yup. Your point?"

Nathan groaned at the sarcasm he was receiving. Couldn't Sam just (for once) take a fucking hint and acknowledge it?

"Please just get changed." Nathan chided. He didn't want the conversation to edge onto any other topics relating to what was currently happening, because Sam would happily take whatever that would be to the next level with no shame whatsoever. Nathan was sure a part of his older brother was unaware of everything he did, but at the same time he was sure he _knew_ what he was doing. And what was the exact purpose of it all?

"…Nathan."

The youngest of the two was unaware himself in that moment, and he had completely spaced out for at least a few seconds or so. He tried not to look at Sam when he heard the sudden drop in his tone.

Nathan responded anyway, but did so quietly. "What?"

Sam blinked. "…Are you gay?"

Fuck.

"Yeah."

The answer came automatically, and if anything very naturally, but it was too quick. _What the hell had just happened? Christ, that wasn't meant to happen._

" _Wow_." Sam's eyes widened, and he didn't seem that surprised. Maybe his question was a complete joke? "I…didn't see that coming." Or…maybe he was being dead serious?

It took a few seconds for Nathan to figure out what he'd just said, and what his brother had just asked. It was the topic of the day for him, considering the several debates he'd had in his head, and it had just gotten to the worst possible level. "I'm…not gay."

Sam sucked on his bottom lip, obviously trying to hide his grin. "You sure?" His little brother glared at him.

"Sam."

"Okay, okay. You're _not_ gay."

Nathan muttered. "I didn't hear your question right…"

Sam snorted. "Oh really? I'm pretty sure you heard me," he glanced at his brother, whose embarrassed gaze dropped to the floor in an instant. Sam had the cheek to bite his bottom lip. "…Is my dick distracting you?"

"Coming from your brother, I don't actually see what's so flattering about it."

"Oh, _God_. The _burn_."

"I'm leaving.” Nathan gripped the door handle, and was on the verge of getting away until Sam grabbed one of his arms; forcefully pushing him against the wall. Nathan let out a gasp at the impact, and Sam came close to his face.

"What kind of guys do you like?" He asked, his voice low and soft, a little husky around the edges. His eyes sparkled with daring curiosity.

"What?" Nathan hissed back, and very quickly realised that his lips were inches apart from his brother's.

"How about we test it?" The elder added.

"Test what?"

"Y'know," Sam paused, tilting his head. "You being _not_ _gay_ and all."

Oh, he was pushing it too far now. "I fucking told you." Nathan snapped then, clearly annoyed, and he tried to wriggle out his brother's grasp.

"Yeah. Verbally." Sam said, keeping his hold on his sibling.

Nathan stopped and glanced upwards. "What?"

Sam hummed, and rolled his eyes momentarily before leaning down, and he cupped his little brother's cheeks; whilst ignoring several protests in response.

"Have you ever kissed anyone?"

_Oh no._

The anger flooded away from Nathan's body, and he fell limp for a few seconds as he heard the question. He played it through his a head a few times.

 _Oh shit_ , he thought. _This shouldn't be happening._

"Have you?" Sam asked again, his eyes wide. Nathan swallowed, unable to get away. Sam wasn't really serious, right?

"You don't need to know that."

"But I want to."

"Why?"

"Well…because I'm your brother."

There was a pause. Then, a harsh mutter came from the youngest, "Fuck you."

A cheeky smile appeared on Sam's face, and his lips parted. His voice quieted and it became low. "Since when do you swear so much?"

Nathan's knees felt like water. "S-Since…"

Sam waited for the answer; not to his subsided, idle question but to the situation as a whole. Nathan couldn't read his older brother like Sam could with him, he just didn't have that sense.

"…I'm not sure…" Nathan finished.

Sam leant in then.

Several possibilities entered Nathan's head when it happened, and he was sure his heart stopped when he felt their lips brush for a millisecond. Sam’s eyes darkened with unpredictability. He whispered, his lips still incredibly close to his brother’s, “I’ll get some clothes on now. Yeah?”

Nathan swallowed, and gave a hesitant nod. His voice felt hoarse. “Yeah.”

 

*** * ***

 

_‘Love, love will tear us apart, again.’_

“What do you want?”

Nathan blinked, still dazed from earlier from what happened in the bathroom. He had been staring out his side of the car window for most of the drive home, the music rolling in the car’s stereo helping him space out. Sam was always the one who had CDs. He was the one that always kept them nice and safe from being thrown into side compartments. He made sure they were always put back into their sleeves or boxes, which was sorta funny to watch.

“What?” Nathan asked back. Sam rolled his eyes and tapped his fingers along the steering wheel.

“Food.” The eldest responded.

“I’m okay without.”

“I. Call. Bull _shit_.”

“I’m not hungry, okay?”

Sam chuckles, his voice low but still somewhat soft. He hummed along to the music, muttered _Joy Division’s_ lyrics under his breath as he reached across his brother to the front compartment, takes out his wallet. “Can it, ya little punk.”

Nathan cringed. “No one says that.”

“Well, I’m pretty sure people _used_ to.”

“Not anymore.”

“I wasn’t meant to be born into this century. I’m an eighties kinda guy.” Sam sighs as they pull up to the drive-thru.

 _Yeah, you just have to listen to the music to know what you’re like_ , Nathan thought.

“Right, what’re you getting?”

Nathan frowned at him. He wasn’t hungry. In fact, his appetite had been shut off. “I told you.”

_“Hi, what can I get you?”_

Sam doesn’t reply as he turns his head back to the speaker, through his open window, and it irritates Nathan.

“Hi, can I get—“ He pauses as he squints at the menu displayed, Nathan has already predicted what’s going to happen; he’s going to duplicate the order. “—two cheeseburger meals with two colas.”

“SAM!”

“You haven’t eaten anything today!”

“I TOLD YOU.”

“You’re eating. I’m _making_ you eat.”

He can’t fight with that kind of voice. The awkward thing with his older brother is that he can go from being super-cute and boy-next-door to I’ll-fucking-dismember-you-if-you-don’t-do-what-I-say.

_“…Will that be everything?”_

“Yup. Thanks.”

Nathan slumped in defeat, tries to ignore the persistent itch of the seatbelt at his collar, and tries to ignore the smug smile plastered on his brother’s face.

“Asshole.” He said aloud.

“That guy sounded cute.” Sam responded, dismissing the petty insult. “Don’t you agree?”

“Don’t push it anymore.”

“I’m not pushing—“

“You _are_!”

_Maybe I should confront him right now._

This wasn’t usually like Sam. It’s all because of Nathan wanting to rush out of the bathroom. That got to him to quickly—and, well, Sam was pretty fucking smart—he was smart enough to know there was a lot of things going on in his little brother’s head, especially at his age now.

“Y’know…” Sam pulls up to the next window, his voice careful and a little hesitant. “I annoy you because I love you, Nathan. You know that, right?”

 _Just how much?_ The thought wandered in the youngest’s head.

“Yeah.”

“Drop the grudge, little brother.”

“It’s just—when…stuff is happening…you…you don’t take me seriously.”

_“That’ll be seven-twenty.”_

Their conversation comes to a short halt when one of the workers appears in the open window, holding the takeout. Sam handed her the change owed and put the takeout in his lap as he drove out of the turn, and into the main parking lot.

“I _do_ take you seriously,” He continued. “I mean you’ll have to accept that I can be a dick sometimes but I know when to stop—“

“I doubt that.” Nathan muttered.

“ _Hey_.” The car jolts to a stop, parked, a comparison to Sam’s sudden change of tone. He takes off his seat belt. “I’m…sorry if I hurt you back there.”

Nathan meets his brother’s eyes. They’re soft and doe-like, rich and gentle, charming and welcoming—sensitive, overall.

“And…I’m sorry if I…made you feel uncomfortable.” He adds, with a slight wince. There it is. The _real_ Sam. The insecurities are exposed there.

“You mean that?” Nathan asked. “Because usually it’s as if you just apologise to stop me from acting like a brat. There’s no depth—“

“You _just_ —“ Sam waves a hand at him, a sign for him to be quiet, and opened up the takeout bag. He’s pushing a readily opened cheeseburger to Nathan’s mouth, forgetting about his personal-bubble, but that never existed. And it never _will_ exist. “ _Eat eat eat_.”

Nathan takes it from him, to stop the prodding. “You don’t want to admit it.”

Sam laughed. “I don’t want to admit it? I’m sorry, I think you’re mistaken,” he pauses, sips at his drink. “We often misunderstand each other. A lot. Like right now. _I love you_. Just remember that. That’s why I’m such a shit person. I’d choose you over anyone, because you’re like—my best friend. You’re my brother—and I think that’s _pretty fucking important_.”

Nathan bites into his burger. “You really weren’t meant to be born into this century.”

_Apology accepted, then._

Sam hummed. “We should start buying vinyl. Bring back the denim on denim. We could become classics.”

“ _You’d_ become a classic.”

“Is that an insult I hear?”

“Maybe.”

“You can call me a classic when I turn forty.”

“Sure.”

”I’ll be like—the new definition of _cool_.”

”Sam, no.”

”You’ll be proud to call me your brother when you get married, I’m telling ya.”

”Oh God.”

 


End file.
